I’m not particularly close with my family. I have members of my family that I love dearly, I have members of my family that I am fairly close with, but besides my kid I am only close to my mother. We had a long hard road to get where we are today. I was an awful teenager. I was mean and rude to her. I was irrational, I was a total crap daughter to her from 15 to 18. When my kid was born 16 years ago my mom stepped in and took on a leading role in my kid’s life. When the kid was little it was dinner every Wednesday night. Now that my kid is older she puts money into a savings account every month, pays for voice lessons, and makes sure she sees my kid at least once a week, usually more. She’s amazing and I couldn’t ask for a better mother. I am so glad that I finally saw past my teenage years and can fully appreciate my mom for who she is and what she does for me and my kid. I love her to the moon and back.
Because my kid is going to the dad’s house tomorrow for the Christmas weekend we decided to have our Christmas today. Mom wanted to cook so she prepared a bunch of side dishes and bought a honey baked ham. I left work early (which I am not supposed to do) so that my kid could open presents before five-thirty. We opened presents and had a good time, once I started Elf on the TV my mom showed up a few minutes later. She came in, unpacked her little wagon of things, checked on how long she would need to cook each dish, then we opened more presents. After all the oohs and aahs we settled back and watched the movie. Shortly into it the side dishes were done and we moved about the kitchen plating everything waiting for her friends to show up. I picked up the living room so that all the presents were put away and out of sight. Again we settled down to chat and watch the movie. My mom’s friends showed up a short time later. After a short chat we moved into the kitchen, plated our food and sat at the table to eat. Even my kid tried a new food, which is a rare occurrence. We enjoyed the meal, had a little dessert, then sat at the table talking for a while.
Normally, I text Sir every night at eight. That’s our routine. If he is available he texts back, but if he is still working it may be a while before I hear back from him. We also have a deal whereas if I am unable to text him at our set time I send him a text saying I am occupied and will text when I am able. Tonight I didn’t do that. I completely forgot. I was so preoccupied with presents and my mom and her friends I couldn’t think of anything outside of my living room.
Sir was of course hurt by my actions, as he well should have been. I am supposed to be a diligent and giving sub, but I forgot about him. That is completely unforgivable. I don’t know how I am supposed to make it up to him or prove to him that he is in my mind for the better part of my days. My Sir is very important to me, his feelings are very important to me, our relationship is very important to me, but I managed to cuck it all up in a single day. My only explanation is that I was preoccupied with other holiday things. Is that enough to be forgiven for forgetting my Sir? I am not sure it is, but I hope he proves to continue to be the kind and understanding Dom that he is. He should be on my mind even when other things are going on in my world. He is normally, I just don’t know what happened tonight. I am terribly sorry I neglected my Sir and my duties to my Sir. Hopefully Sir can see past my transgression and forgive me pretty quickly. I feel awful about what I did, and I know Sir felt slighted by my lack of communication. I never want to disappoint Sir and it breaks my heart when I do. I have nothing but respect and admiration for Sir, but I made a huge mistake tonight and I am truly sorry. My biggest wish this evening is that Sir can accept my apology and forgive me for this digression. We have just gotten to a level of understanding and acceptance that I have no wish to interrupt. Tomorrow we will meet for dinner and I hope beyond hope that he has forgiven me and accepted my apology so we can have an enjoyable evening without worrying about this.
Sir gave me one directive this week. He has asked me about it twice and twice I have been distracted forgetting to do as I was told. Today I remember what I was told to do and I have successfully started dilation. I have a three sized system and size one is in and comfortable. Sir should be pleased I hope.